Is Forgiving The Doorway To Forgetting?

"You must make allowance for each other's faults and forgive the person who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others." Colossians 3:13

Bishop Ef Tendero was teaching once about conflict in Toronto and I still remember what he said: "When two or three are gathered . . . . . there will be conflict." This is so true. There will be those who will offend and those who will be offended. Forgiveness is a command to all and its not an option. A person who can not forgive is really in sin though he is the offended party. It is not even conditional to the other person's asking for forgiveness sincerely. And since forgiveness helps the offended more than the offender, it is vital that we forgive in our hearts even when the offender do not ask for forgiveness.

Observe how much our hearts deteriorate when we do not forgive:

"And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Ephesians 4:30-32

When we are offended and we fail to forgive, we become bitter, and then bitterness swells that will develop into anger which like a volcano, your anger will explode into rage! Then when you come to church you will tend to talk to others against the person who offended you, even resulting to slandering him/her. Eventually when these words get into each others ears brawling could ensue. Every time you see that person in church or somewhere else, you will always suspect him of plotting against you especially when he is talking to your friends. Nothing will he/she do that will mean any good to you but you will always suspect him/her of plotting against you even the good deeds that he/she does.

Dangerous place to be. That is why we are commanded to forgive because an unforgiving person is not able to do anything for the glory of God. Even when we offer our offerings to God, it is not glorifying to Him unless our hands are clean.

"leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift." Matthew 5:24

Forgive and Forget. This is what we advise people who are having a hard time forgiving. But is it really possible for someone to forget after he or she has forgiven an offender?

"Then he adds: 'Their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more.' And where these have been forgiven, there is no longer any sacrifice for sin." Hebrews 10:17-18

Does the all knowing God really remember no more? Is that possible? What does this mean? I believe this simply means that He will not hold these forgiven offenses against us anymore.

It is one thing to talk about God's forgiveness towards us and another when we talk about one man forgiving another. Our traumatic memories will never allow us to forget the offense nor the offender. But since our hearts need to be protected from the poison of bitterness, we must forgive and forget. This simply means we will not hold these offense against the offender any more. We will not keep any list that will be taken out every time you want to point out the offenders faults or worse yet, for you to resort to "emotional blackmail".

It is not easy to do this. You notice that even after you have forgiven, you would rather not deal with that person again. We prefer to avoid encountering that person for as long as we hurt. No, we should not become unguarded and fall victim into the same offense again knowingly but we must not dismiss a person just for the fear of being hurt again. That person needs you and your gifts as much as you need that person in the church with all his warts and pimples. God provided you to each other for your edification with all your strengths and weaknesses.

Our churches will never be conflict free until the Lord returns. Let us not throw the baby with the bath water. You need the church and the church needs you. God will give you grace to be able to go through the trials even in the church. I assure you, you will be better in spite of it . . . . . you will be better because of it. Just be quick to forgive. It is better by far.

Which Came First, The Chicken or The Egg?

Everything was created through him; nothing - not one thing! - came into being without him. John 1:3 (The Message)

For everything, absolutely everything, above and below, visible and invisible, rank after rank after rank of angels - everything got started in him and finds its purpose in him. He was there before any of it came into existence and holds it all together right up to this moment. Colossians 1:16-17 (The Message)


Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Believe it or not, scientists, as announced on the radio just the other day, DISCOVERED that the first one to appear was . . . . . . "TAN-TA-TA-TANNNNNNNNN" . . . . . . THE CHICKENNNNNNNNN!

How did they find out? They discovered that eggs could only be produced by a special protein which is found in a chicken. Logical isn't it? You give it to these scientists. They will spend millions of tax-payer's dollars to discover these things. I hope you are in a better situation now that they have added this discovery in our lives.

But you know what? We know that all along; we who are familiar with the Bible just like the two verses above. So as of this discovery? It adds very little to my knowledge. Does it add anything to our faith? Not really, unless you are not familiar with the Word of God or even worse, not sure about it.

This is where the rubber meets the road. How sure are you of your faith? The Lord, according to some experts, left us with over 8,000 promises in the Bible. Are we confident that He will fulfill His promises? Every single one of them? During troubled times, are we quick to flip through the promises of God to be encouraged and strengthened? Or we simply take the matter on our hands without consulting Him first? Or even worse, run around scared like a chicken with its head cut off!

In 1974 the Ethiopian Emperor Haile Selassie was deposed from his throne by the rebels. For ten years, the monarchy lived in a small quarter with others with only one small opening for fresh air to come in. The life in that enclosed room was so desperate that after 10 years in this condition and after they were let go when the rebels were overthrown, people who saw them were astonished how the children of the emperor came out in high spirits. When asked what kept them hopeful during the decade of being in jail, the children said that all the verses they memorized from Sunday School helped them survive daily specially in deep troubling times.

Let us do ourselves a favour. Let us not continue one minute in our pilgrimage without the Word of God guiding our hearts and minds 'til He returns.

"The law of the LORD is perfect, reviving the soul. The statutes of the LORD are trustworthy, making wise the simple. The precepts of the LORD are right, giving joy to the heart. The commands of the LORD are radiant, giving light to the eyes. The fear of the LORD is pure, enduring forever. The ordinances of the LORD are sure and altogether righteous. They are more precious than gold, than much pure gold; they are sweeter than honey, than honey from the comb." Psalm 19:7-10

(I could almost hear Lloyd, now a missionary in Africa singing this in one of our Friday night Bible studies in the 70's.)

Knock Three Times

Remember Tony Orlando and Dawn? Yes, the infamous Knock Three Times, which was recorded in 1970 while we were in High School, at least some of us, were. This famous song sold 9 Million copies in 1971 and became number 1 hit in January that year. Remember the 45 single? This song was released in that format with Candida on the flipside.

Why did I mention this song? 

Well I was just reminded of a day while I was in our small town in Bulacan, Philippines way back in that era. While I was walking along our lonely highway, a gravel truck passed by coming from the other side of the town going towards the cemetery. I noticed that the band at the back of the truck was playing "Knock Three Times" while they were seated around a small white, homemade small coffin. The coffin was obviously for a small child. I was told that when a baby is being buried, the band, hired by the bereaved, would play upbeat songs, which is not true, of course when an adult dies. Well "Knock Three Times" is certainly upbeat.

But could you imagine what chaos would have happened if there were really knocks coming from the small coffin. This is the making of a Filipino slapstick movie where normally, Dolphy, the Filipino comedy king would be very successful to make moviegoers laugh! Can you imagine him, those of you who have seen his movies especially in his younger years? The guy is almost 83 you know and his last movie was just last year. Can you imagine him as one of the musicians who would hear the knocks and then he will get into his hyperventilating fit as if he is having a serous asthma attack. Well as you know the only faithful companion of this guy is his life-long asthma. He was married many times, had relationships with countless women and fathered at least 10 kids in the process. He is still married to Zsa Zsa Padilla, 35 years younger than him.

Well let me get back to why I mentioned this famous Tony Orlando and Dawn song. Three days after I left Manila to come to Toronto, I received a disturbing news from Manila that Audrey heard three knocks from outside her bedroom window that night as she was sitting at her desk. Twice she heard it, which made her run to her mom who was in the adjacent room which is our bedroom. These two ladies were the only ones in our rented home in Manila. Needless to say, those made me think if I should not abandon my plans here in Toronto to rescue my ladies from this dangerous, scary situation. My very composed wife, Rosie, called the security guard from the gate of the subdivision and also the manager of World Team's guesthouse, which is only 10 minutes away from us. They all came to our home to check on my family who remained safe for that evening and even to this day. Thank you Lord and to all who were there while I was not!

I realize how helpless we are in any situation of our lives. Events like these make you realize that no one can really give us the assurance apart from God and His love. God's love for us is 1. unconditional, 2. sufficient, and 3. reliable.

"31 So, what do you think? With God on our side like this, how can we lose? 32 If God didn't hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn't gladly and freely do for us? 33 And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God's chosen? 34 Who would dare even to point a finger? The One who died for us - who was raised to life for us! - is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us. 35 Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ's love for us? There is no way! Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing, not even the worst sins listed in Scripture: 36 They kill us in cold blood because they hate you. We're sitting ducks; they pick us off one by one. 37 None of this fazes us because Jesus loves us. 38 I'm absolutely convinced that nothing - nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, 39 high or low, thinkable or unthinkable - absolutely nothing can get between us and God's love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us." Romans 8:31-39 The Message

The song goes:

if you look out your window tonite

pulling the string with the note that’s attached to my heart

read how many times I saw you

how in my silence I adored you

and only in my dreams did that wall between us come apart

chorus

Oh my darlin

knock three times on the ceiling if you want me

twice on the pipe if the answer is no

oh my sweetness

means you'll meet me in the hallway

twice on the pipe means you ain't gonna show

More beautiful to our ears than the song is the fact that we don't even need to knock ones to be heard by God:

"5 "And when you come before God, don't turn that into a theatrical production either. All these people making a regular show out of their prayers, hoping for stardom! Do you think God sits in a box seat? 6 "Here's what I want you to do: Find a quiet, secluded place so you won't be tempted to role-play before God. Just be there as simply and honestly as you can manage. The focus will shift from you to God, and you will begin to sense his grace. 7 "The world is full of so-called prayer warriors who are prayer-ignorant. They're full of formulas and programs and advice, peddling techniques for getting what you want from God. 8 Don't fall for that nonsense. This is your Father you are dealing with, and he knows better than you what you need. 9 With a God like this loving you, you can pray very simply." Matthew 6:5-9

Enjoy your day!